Seussical the Musical rehearsal bloopers
by InnocentSmile97
Summary: Like in all good theatre productions, things never go quite to plan! People falling over, mixing up lines, being very melodramatic, yep we had it all! So this is all those bits from the auditions to the performance. All really what happened!
1. Chapter 1

**Seussical the musical rehearsal bloopers**

My school has recently done "Seussical the musical Jr" as our school musical and, like in all good theatre productions, things never go quite to plan! People falling over, mixing up lines, being very melodramatic, yep we had it all! So instead of forgetting it all I wrote it down and turned it into this. This was inspired by xDefyingxGravityx's "What happened at rehearsals" (that was an Oliver! production) and disneydork29175's "Seussical bloopers". Everything in here is really what happened (and yes, I am aware that we are a little insane)!

I 3 SEUSSICAL!

*Cough, cough* Well, the production ran from the summer term all the way to Christmas performances. Oh, and we are a girls school so all parts are (surprise, surprise) played by girls. Even the male parts.

I've split all the bloopers up into chunks for chapters. Also, ALL NAMES IN HERE HAVE BEEN CHANGED/PART NAMES USED!

I think that's all, so just get ready for mischief, mayhem and madness!

~#~

**Chapter 1:**

These happened in the summer term. Rehearsals were very slow to start as the scripts didn't arrive until the Wednesday before we broke up. We all did an audition to get in but instead of putting up a cast list with all the parts on, they just told us who was in. Annoying, I know but it was because of those stupid scripts! Anyway, that means that CHANGED NAMES are used in here instead of part names (as I obviously don't know them). I will be using part names later though, when I do know.

**1: Cutting scenes**

_(Director is reading the cast the plot of the musical.)_

**Director:**"… the giant egg begins to crack and out comes an Elephant Bird." Well, we all know how that happens… and we won't be acting that part out onstage!

**2: A tad OTT**

_(We are creating short scenes of the Jungle of Nool. A group are performing a rather weird piece. Some are being the river, other animals. Katherine is being a very enthusiastic kangaroo. The rest of the group freezes and finishes but Kat continues.)_

**Ellie**: Err… Kat… Kat… Kat…

_(Kat continues to prance about.)_

**Group**: You can stop now!

**Kat**: What? _(Looks__around__in__confusion)_ Oh!

**Director**: Well, someone wants to be the Sour Kangaroo…

**3: "Before" is a confusing word**

_(Director is explaining "sound scape" which we used in our Jungle of Nool scenes.)_

**Director**: Can one of the older girls explain sound scape? We've done it before. Yes, Nicky.

**Nicky**: Someone sits in the middle and you ask them questions –

**Director**: That's hotseating, Nicky. We did that in our lesson today…

**Nicky**: Oh, um, right. _(Pretends__she__know__what__she__'__s__on__about)_

**4: The flaw in the plan**

_(Me and my two friends, Sapphire and Rose, are walking to school discussing what parts we want to play.)_

**Saph**: _(To__me)_ Wouldn't it be cool if I was Cat in the Hat and you were Jojo!

**Me****and****Rose**: Err… _(I__'__m__way__taller__than__she__is!)_

**Saph**: Oh but then I'd have to wear a hat that's like 6ft tall… hmm…

**5: No. 1 reason**

_(On way home, me and Saph.)_

**Saph**: Hey, I could be Cat! I do a really good cat purr, wanna hear?

_(In case you haven't guessed yet, Saph quite likes the part of Cat.)_

**6: Overruled!**

**Director**: _(To__cast)_Now, as scripts haven't arrived yet, there is not much we can do. So, we can either cancel this rehearsal or play some drama games?

**A****random****yr****7**: _(referring__to__drama__games)_ YES!

**Everyone****else**: NOOO!

**7: Intentions**

_(It's a casting session, so we all had to perform a simple song in rounds in small groups of about 12.)_

**Director**: Ok! Next group please!

_(Nicky and Anna's [Anna is a yr 8] group got up to do their one. They start to walk backwards to make more room but fail to notice the block behind them… Nicky realises far too late, pulling Anna down with her. They both collapse all over the block, try to style it out but just end up falling to the floor. The cast start to laugh.)_

**Me**: That was so obviously intended!

**8: Cut**

_(My group is currently performing our song. We're split into three rounds. My round finishes. So does round 2s. Round 3 are just about to finish but are quite quiet.)_

**Round****3s**: Shine on – _(Cast__starts__clapping)_

**Saph**: Oh! But we haven't finished!

**9: Supernatural powers**

_(The Directors are just having a quick discussion during casting session so we all talk amongst ourselves.)_

**Natasha**: (_Quietly)_ Please, please, please – me for Cat in the Hat! I have the charisma and everything! Please!

**Me**: Why don't you just tell them telepathically?

**Tasha**: _(Takes__this__literally__and__starts__staring__hard__at__the__Directors__and__using__wild__hand__gestures.)_

**Me**: Oh God…

**10: A narrow escape**

_(A few of us, including me, have to stay behind after the casting session because the Directors want to hear us sing more solo. We each have to sing "Doe a dear". Everyone starts to realise what we have to do and shuffles on their bottoms to the back. Nicky's a bit slow on the uptake.)_

**Director**: Nicky! Why don't you go first? You've had lots of experience.

**Nicky**: _(With__a__very__pained__expression)_ Ok… _(Stands__up__and__gets__in__position,__looking__awkward)_ Can Lily do it?

**Lily**: _(Gets__up__reluctantly__as__Nicky__hurries__to__sit__down__again)_Ooh, the things I do for my best friend!

**11: The toilet dance**

**Millie**: _(In__my__year.__As__she__walks__up__for__her__go)_ I really need the loo!

**Director**: Don't worry; it'll be good for the adrenaline.

**Me**: ?

**Millie**: Um, ok then.

_(Millie seems unable to stand still. She opens her mouth several times but says nothing, looking like a goldfish.)_

**Director**: _(after__a__while__of__Millie__looking__incredibly__uncomfortable__and__quite__silly)_ Do you really need to go?

**Millie**: I REALLY NEED TO PEE!

**Director**: Fine, be quick!

_(Millie makes a mad dash for the door.)_

**12: An interesting new remix**

_(A girl is doing her "Doe a dear".)_

**A****yr****8**: _(singing)_ Far, I drink with jam and bread! _(Everyone__looks__around__in__confusion)_ Oh sorry, I meant tea…

~#~

Well, there you go! A little taster of us all. 12 bloopers in the space of about two rehearsals… Goodness knows what it's going to be like with more and more rehearsals as we get closer to performance! Watch this space – next chapter everyone will be cast! Including me :O


	2. Chapter 2

**Chapter 2:**

PARTS ARE CAST! OMG! Yes, it finally happened after about 2 months of keeping us on the edge. I'm "Yertle the Turtle" – not quite what I wanted but any part is better than no part at all! And at least I'm named. ;)

Here are the characters that people mentioned in the first chapter received (Or at least the ones whose parts I can remember):

Lily – Horton the Elephant

Nicky – A lead bird girl

Saph – Who

Rose – Bird girl

Tasha – Lead Who

Millie – Mrs Mayor

There was quite a bit of disappointment but after all, not everyone can have a main part! I think we're doing it in a style where everyone will be onstage all the time though, so smaller part shouldn't be too boring to do!

Moving on, the first two bloopers in this happened just before the summer holidays but the rest was from September onwards. From now on I'll be using part names.

**1: At least I tried**

**Me**: _(Walking__past__a__mate)_ Oh heya!

**Vlad****Vladikoff**: Hey!

**Me**: So what part did you get in Seuss?

**Vlad**: _(flatly)_I'm a fat, evil vulture.

**Me**: _(Trying__to__make__her__feel__better)_ That's great!

**Vlad**: _(Gives__me__a__long__hard__stare)_

**Me**:_(Shrinks)_

**2: A change of heart**

_(Me and Who are doing a quiz in a magazine where we have to think of things we both like.)_

**Me**: Ummm…. School musicals?

**Who**: No. Just no.

**Me**: I'll shorten that to just musicals then…

**3: Scared**

**Cat**: _(coming__up__to__me__before__first__rehearsal)_Omigosh I'm so scared!

**Me**: Don't worry you'll be fine!

**Cat**: Ahhhhhhhh!

_(Later Cat does 'Oh, the Thinks you can Think' perfectly while others still can't remember lyrics.)_

**Me**: Scared?

**4: Obsessed?**

**Friend**: Who are you in Seuss?

**Me**: Yertle the Turtle.

**Friend**: OMG! I wanna be a turtle! Yay, turtles! _(Continues__to__talk__about__turtles)_

**Me**: …

**5: There's always 1**

**Musical****Director**: Ok everyone and –

**All**: _(singing)_ Seuss, Seuss, Seuss!

**One****random****person**: Seuss!

**M****Director**: _(glares__at__us)_Let's try that again.

**6: Got to fix that**

**Director**: _(talking__to__cast)_ In a second we're going to split you into –

_(Cut off by screaming coming from the back. Everyone looks about. Spots a few girls who had been sitting on tables, on the floor.)_

**Who**: What happened?

**Jungle****animal:** _(On__the__floor,__laughing)_The… the table broke!

_(The table is slanted and a leg is wobbling about.)_

**Director**: Such a great start.

**7: Gertie 1**

**Who**: _(Spots__my__proper__script__rather__than__a__photocopy)_ Oooh, are you Gertrude?

**Me**: No, Yertle the turtle.

**Who**: _(not__as__excited)_ Oh right.

**Me**: Gee, thanks.

**8: American Vs English**

**Mrs****Mayor**: _(To__Music__Director)_ Can I just ask; are we supposed to be American?

**M****Director**: Um… I don't actually know.

**Horton**: The CD is American and it sounds really good, so I learnt it all in American.

**Mrs****M**: Same! It doesn't sound right in English.

**M****Director**: Oh, I don't know!

**Mrs****M**: Can I just ask the Director?

**M****Director**: Go on then.

_(Mrs M goes and comes back.)_

**Mrs****M**: _(Sulkily)_ She said English.

**Horton**: What? But I can't do it in English!

**Sour****Kangaroo**: Do I have to be English too? I sound better American…

**M****Director**: Well, you're Blues… so no, you can be American.

**SK**: _(grabbing__any__excuse__she__can)_Yes, exactly… I'm err… Blues…

**Mrs****M**: _(reads__part__of__her__script__in__a__dull__English__accent)_ See? Not right!

**M****Director**: _(sigh)_ English is what she said.

**Horton**: Well, she'll just have to change her mind! _(Points__to__a__bit__in__her__script)_ It doesn't fit when we say _(English)_ "advance" and "chance" not _(American)_ "advance" and "chance".

**M****Director**: Don't look at me! I don't have an American or English accent!

**9: Gertie 2**

_(The photocopied scripts are so bad that some of my friends don't have the pages we're singing from.)_

**Me**: _(seeing__that__they__look__very__lost__and__handing__them__my__script)_ Here. Take it. I'm not even supposed to be in this song; I'm just singing along!

**Who****1**: Who are you?

**Who****2**: Gertrude?

**Me**: No! Yertle the turtle!

**Me**: _(Thinking)_What? Do I look like I have a one-feathered tail or something?

**10: The new Mrs Mayor**

_(We're doing a quick run through of a song while Mrs M is off asking about the American accents.)_

**Horton**: _(realising__Mrs__M__has__a__bit__coming__up__and__she__'__s__not__there)_ I'll do her bit!

**Mr****Mayor**: _(speaking)_I'm the mayor.

**Whos****me****who****is****scrapping****in****because****I****don****'****t****know****which****chorus****part****I****'****m****supposed****to****be****singing****with**: _(singing)_ Who, who, who who!

**Horton**: _(At__the__top__of__her__voice)_I'M HIS WIFE!

_(Everything goes quiet.)_

**All**: _(Burst__into__laughter.)_

**11: Gertie 3**

**Me**: _(To__Musicals__Director)_ I'm not sure which group I'm supposed to be singing with…

**M****Director**: _(Whips__out__her__script__and__flips__open__the__page__with__a__post-it__note__labelled__ "__Gertrude__" __on__it)_You're Gertrude, right?

**Me**: _(Getting__a__bit__confused__now.__Is__this__some__kind__of__prank?)_ No. I'm Yertle… Yertle the turtle.

**12: Getting into it**

_(Horton has her hands in front of her and has been staring blankly at it for the whole song.)_

**Me**: What the hell are you doing?

**Horton**: It's my imaginary clover! _(Goes__back__to__staring__at__nothing.)_

**13: The trouble with two conversations**

_(We've all just been let out of rehearsal.)_

**Me**: _(To__Who)_I don't know why but everyone thinks I'm playing Gertrude! 3 people have mistaken me today… 3! Why, oh why?

**Who**: You look like a Gertrude.

**Mr****Mayor**: I just need to get something, will you wait for me?

**Me**: _(Replying__to__Who.__Scoffing)_ Ha! Noooooo.

**Mr****M**: _(Looks__very__offended.)_

~#~

Sorry it's been so long! Had to wait the whole summer hols before we could get back into rehearsing. Hope you enjoyed and remember to review, review, review! (And I still really have no clue why they all thought I was Gertrude…)


	3. Chapter 3

**Chapter 3:**

Blocking starts! Not the most fun bit but hey-ho.

**1: Casting problems**

Director: Ok, can I take all the Jungle Animals please. (No-one moves) Can all the Jungle Animals put up their hands. (No-one puts up their hand) Ah. We didn't cast any Jungle Animals…

**2: BEWARE… of the stage blocks…**

**Jojo**: _(walking__through__audience)_ Now that's a very unusual hat. _(Climbs__up__on__stage__blocks)_ I wonder what's under a haaaaaa…. _(discovers__that__the__stage__bocks__haven__'__t__been__fixed__together__yet__and__looks__like__she__'__d__doing__some__kind__of__jelly__dance__…__)_

**3: The backing track**

**Cat**: _(Running__up__onto__stage__blocks)_ Why I can see that you've got quite a mind for your age! Why… one Think… _(gets__a__bit__confused__because__she__'__s__now__out__of__sync__with__with__the__voice__on__the__CD.__Eventually__gives__up__and__just__stands__there__and__facepalms.)_

**Director**: _(sighs)_From the top!

**4: S-E-U-S-S**

**Director**: Ok, then you all say Zueuss… Zueuss… Zueuss, Zueuss, Zueuss…

**All**: _(Looks__at__each__other__and__shrugs)_

**Jungle****Animal**: _(to__me)_ Someone need to tell her it's Seuss…

**Me**: Oh God.

**5: Is sitting really that hard?**

_(At the end of "Oh the Thinks you can Think" everyone sits down.)_

**Wickershams**: Owww!

_(Everyone turns around. The Wickershams have somehow managed to sit down on top of each other. Several are rubbing their bumped foreheads. All of them are guffawing.)_

**Me**: _(Eye__rolls)_Only the Wickershams!

**6: Again?**

_(At the end of "OtTycT" again. Everyone sits down. Again.)_

**Jungle****Animal**: _(Slips__and__sits__down__really__heavily.)_

**Me**: Smooooth.

**JA**: _(Checks__no-one__else__saw)_ I know right! _(Winks)_

**7: Caught in the act**

_(As everyone is still coming into rehearsals Cat and Sour Kangaroo are doing a very melodramatic performance of "Jar of Hearts". Director comes in behind them.)_

**Wickersham**: Emm guys… you might wanna… _(Points__behind__them)_

_(Cat and SK look round and see Director starring at them.)_

**Cat**: Oh. Opps!

**8: Marriage issues**

**Mayor:**_(to__me)_ Where's Mrs Mayor?

**Me**: Don't think she can come…

**Mayor**: OMG! This is not acceptable! _(darkly)_ We now have marriage issues.

**9: Gosh**

**Director:**_(to__Cat)_ Then you see Mr and Mrs Mayor coming and be all like "oh Gosh".

**Cat**: _(very__high__pith__and__complete__with__hand__gestures)_ Oh Gosh!

**Director**: Not literally…

**10: Look busy**

**Jojo:**It's on channel two! _(Pause.__Look__around__for__Cat.)_

**Director**: Cat! Come on you're supposed to be here!

_(Cat is sitting in the corner with a girl on her knee, chatting.)_

**Cat**: Oh sorry! _(pushes__girl__off__knee__and__sprints__to__her__position.)_

**11: Pencil threats**

**Musical****Director**: Girls, can we stop this chatter! _(Gets__a__pencil__out__and__starts__tapping__it__on__top__of__the__piano.)_

**Sour****Kangaroo**: Shut up! She will dash that pen! _(Everyone__looks__a__bit__weary.)_

**Mayor**: She will; she did it to [Sour Kangaroo]!

**SK**: Yes, and it hit me right here. _(points__to__a__bit__on__her__forearm.)_ It was a pretty good shot.

_(People still aren't shutting up. M Director glances at box of pencil on the desk.)_

**Mayor**: Oh no, get ready for the pencil pot!

**12: The who pun**

**Director:**___(Looks__at__small__cluster__of__whos)_Hold on… who's missing?

_(Whos start laughing. Director facepalms.)_

**13: High School Musical**

**Me**: _(to__Cat)_ Hello!

_Cat_: Hey! _(Suddenly__looks__like__she__'__s__forgotten__something)_Ummm… ummm… WILD CATS IN THE HOUSE! _(Starts__singing__HSM__and__dances__off.)_

**Me**: _(rolls__eyes)_

~#~

Not long till performances so it'll be all work work work for us! Read and review!


	4. Chapter 4

**Chapter 4:**

I am so sorry – Seuss rehearsals kinda took over my life so not much time for anything else! Which means I haven't been recording bloopers as I go! I've tried to remember as much as I can but I know I've missed stuff out :'(

Also just finished performances! Soooo fun! And a bit mad with things like walking to school green the next day from face paint, Cat and me finding lots of pennies and getting kicked out of the mini greenroom, running about school dressed as a turtle and my cape not being set in one of the performances!

So let me just get on with the last chapter of bloopers!

~#~

**1: A little bit mean**

**Horton**: _(to__Mayzie)_I'll sit on your egg and I'll try not to break it…

**Bird****Girl**: LOL!

**2: Changing the order**

**Director**: _(to__a__member__of__the__backstage__crew)_ Oh, and we need 20 mini clovers. _(she__'__s__been__calling__out__the__props__we__need__all__through__rehearsal.)_

**Crew****Member****1**: 20? But you'd said 12! _(Director__had__already__gone__back__to__directing.)_

**CM2**: We'd better call Sarah.

**CM1**: She's gonna have a fit…

**3: When normal isn't good enough**

**Jungle****Animal**: _(has__to__shuffle__up__the__aisle__we__'__re__seated__in.__But__instead__of__sliding__along__on__her__bum__she__scrambles__around__on__her__tummy__doing__some__mad__army__crawl.__When__she__'__s__there__she__looks__back__and__sees__me__staring__bewildered__at__her.)_

**Me**: And why couldn't you do it normally?

**4: We react so well**

**Horton:** _(gasps)_ Hunters!

_(Everyone is supposed to gasp but doesn't.)_

**Dance****Director:** C'mon guys! This is shocking! Horton has been attacked by HUNTERS! If a gun was to his head would you all be sitting there like "oh, oh well"? _(No__answer)_

**5: More pencils**

**Music****Director**: _(getting__frustrated__with__us)_ Oh, I wish I had a pencil! _(A__few__people__laugh)_ It's not funny – I do throw pencils, don't I, girls in Senior Choir?

**Senior****Choir**: Yes, she does!

**Mayor**: Just ask Matilda – she gets it all the time.

**SK**: _(takes__out__a__pencil__from__her__pocket.__Baby__SK__shakes__her__head__and__pushes__the__pencil__down.)_

**6: Fail**

_(In class discussing our Citizenship presentation.)_

**Friend**: And then the Sky News theme plays -

**Me**: _(interrupting)_ Live from Skycam Five! _(Silence)_Ok, none of you are in Suess…

**7: Little**

**Music****Director:** Millie's row, you've got to sing!

**Mrs****Mayor****and****Jungle****Animal:** _(look__at__each__other)_ Which one?

**MD**: Little Millie, not big Millie.

**JA**: Emphasise on the little! (_She__'__s__really,__really__small)_

**8: Mental children**

**Me**: _(just__after__our__performance__to__the__Primary__kids)_How'd you think that went?

**Bird****Girl**: I was a bit concerned with the boy I was sitting near… he was picking up the fallen feathers of our tails… and licking them…

**9: Such a flirt**

(During 'Mayzie in Palm Beach')

**Director**: Wickershams, you have my permission to wolf whistle at this bit!

_(This Wickershams immediately take this to the extreme. They start wolf whistling and checking Mayzie out. One Wick even stands up and starts tailing Mayzie round the stage, flirting. Mayzie begins to look worried and starts running away.)_

**Director**: Ok, that's enough! Maybe just stick to winking when she walks past.

**10: Not enough of a flirt**

**Dance****Director**: _(to__Bird__Girls__during__ '__Biggest__Blame__Fool__'__)_ Girls, you're supposed to be flirting with the Wickershams! They're your boyfriends! If this is how you flirt, then I pity you all…

**11: Spelling lessons**

**Mr****Mayor**: OMG! They spelt my name wrong on the sign _(where__we__have__to__put__our__costume)_! They spelt it "Major". What the hell, I'm not a Major, I'm a Mayor! Hey, they spelt your name wrong to – "Yurtel". This simply isn't good enough.

**12: Casually rearranging the signs…**

**Cat**: Erm, why is your sign not next to mine? _(looks__offended)_

**Me**: I didn't put it there.

**Cat**: Gosh! _(Runs__across__room,__takes__down__my__sign__and__puts__it__right__next__to__hers.)_ That's better.

**13: Opps, that might've been racist**

**Cat**: _(during__performance)_ And SOLD to the man with _(the__lady__she__'__s__looking__at__happens__to__be__wearing__a__headscarf)_ the headscarf and the greasy black moustache. _(Lady__looks__confused.__Realisation__dawns__on__Cat.__Genuinely)_ Oh… excuse me madam… _(A__few__laugh__uncertainly)_

_(Afterwards we were all howling with laughter :3)_

**14: Minutes before the performance**

**CM1**: Hey, we're gonna be filling in for the two missing Jungle Animals.

**JA1**: Why?

**CM2**: Because someone decided to go to Birmingham for the final performance.

**Me**: Ok, do you know what you're doing?

**CM1**: Nope.

**JA2**: Have you been taught the steps?

**CM2**: Noooo.

**JA1**: Do you know the lyrics?

**CM1**: Kinda…

**CM2**: Trust me, we did not volunteer to do this!

**15: Daddy**

**Who**: _(who__has__just__been__told__she__has__to__be__the__understudy__for__the__Mayor__in__one__of__the__performance.__To__Jojo)_I'm your father!

**Jojo**: Okaaaaaay…. You're kinda creeping me out…

**16: Green… still**

**Me**: _(sees__and__Who__and__laughs__at__her__slightly__greeny__face.__Who__and__Bird__Girl__give__me__a__look.)_ What?

**Bird****Girl:** Hate to say this, but you really can't talk!

~#~

It's been so fun and although it wasn't the best performance our School's ever done, it was amazing to be part of! And I'm really annoyed with myself that I didn't right down all the other bloopers because there are so many more, including a really cool rap about Horton that SK made up but I can't remember! So yes, you now know how bonkers we are (and I haven't even told you when we cleaned the dusty floor with our leggings) but I love them all and have made some great friends (Caaaaaaaaaaaat love you ^-^)!

So please, review, leave your comments or even your own experiences!


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